What is relationship therapy and couples counselling?
Relationship therapy, and couples counselling, is a talking therapy that allows you to talk about your problems and feelings, individually or as a couple. Couples counselling used to be known as 'marriage guidance' this has advanced enormously over the years. Relationships are an integral part of life, be this with your partner, family, friends, and work colleagues. Relationships bring many rewards however, it can be challenging to establish and maintain healthy relationships depending on your experiences of past relationships.
The way people communicate and form relationships have changed in recent years. Technology, too, has had a significant impact on how we see ourselves, relationships, and how we relate to others. Living in such preoccupied times, and with every-day demands can put a lot of pressure on a relationship. You may find yourselves feeling as though you are growing apart, or being torn in different directions, which can be even more prevalent when children come along.
'A relationship is similar to caring for a plant. You have to give it water, re-pot it in the right seasons, feed, and give it regular attention for it to flourish and grow to its full potential'.
The key ingredients for a healthy relationship is good communication with one another, spending quality time together to keep connected, also identifying and understanding what you need from the 'couple relationship'. If these key things are not happening in the relationship, you both can start to feel isolated and alone, which can create bad cycles and patterns of behaviours, you both can often get 'stuck in'. It is also common when you are both feeling this way to become resentful of the other. It can feel like it is an impossible task to find your way out of the 'stuckness', and it can lead to feelings of 'hopelessness' in the relationship.
What can have an effect on my relationship(s)?
Your childhood experiences and social influences can affect your behaviours, and the way you act in relationships. More often than not, you are 'conditioned 'by your upbringing and how you have experienced your relationship with your parents. These relationships with parents shape your ideas of love, values, boundaries, patterns of behaviours and your outlook on life. If your childhood experiences have involved any forms of abuse, or neglect in some way or another, this can have a detrimental impact on how you view relationships. This affects how you form attachments, or not as the case may be, to others in your life.
Outside of your childhood experiences, there are many other issues you may have faced individually, or in your couple relationships, such as a miscarriage, health issues, intimacy, depression, anxiety, work-related stresses, and your relationships with your children.
How can relationship therapy, and couples counselling help; what are the benefits?
You will of course experience difficulties in the relationship from time to time, this is entirely natural. All Relationships are challenging, and they are supposed to be. A relationship is a continuing journey of growth and development, and overcoming adversities will bring you closer together as a couple.
It is important when you have couples counselling that you both will be open and honest with one another. I understand how difficult this can be, especially when things have not been addressed for a long time, or you both feel awkward. Without being open, you both will not get the outcomes from the relationship that you are seeking.
It is common to want your partner to think and feel the same way that you do. However, you both may have a different perspectives which is normal, as you are both unique individuals in your own right. I will facilitate this process, as it is my role to support you both to see how the other is thinking and feeling.
'Relationship therapy and couples counselling will only be as effective as you both make it, what you put in to your relationship journey is what you will get out of it'.
Benefits of having relationship therapy and couples counselling:
- I can help you both to be able to open up to one another and to explore your relationship difficulties in a neutral and safe environment.
- We will explore the triggers in your relationship and how this has manifested, to allow you both to identify the impact this is having on your relationship.
- I will support you both to understand your thoughts, and feelings around your personal experiences to improve your self-defeating thoughts about the relationship.
- We will look at the habitual habits that have been formed in the relationship, and begin to break these down in the sessions bit by bit.
- I can support you both to begin the journey to improve your thought patterns and behaviours towards one another.
- I work with you both to have a greater understanding of each other by using the key relationship principles, techniques, models and interventions.
- I will set tasks between sessions to support you both with communication and reconnecting with one another.
What is the process for having relationship therapy, and couples counselling?
- We will meet for an initial consultation/assessment, and this allow you both the opportunity to meet with me, to ensure you feel I am the right person for you.
- I will advise you both about confidentiality, data protection, and then give you a copy of the counselling agreement to sign if you both decide to go ahead with the couple's therapy.
- In couples counselling, after the initial appointment, I will have an individual session with each of you. This will be in no particular order unless agreed otherwise in the session with you both. This will allow both the opportunity to freely explore any areas that could be useful for you.
- I will identify with you both what each of you believe to be the barriers in the relationship, and what you would both like to gain from the couple counselling sessions.
- Sessions last 50 minutes per session, sessions are mainly weekly, to begin with, they can move to fortnightly once you both feel you need less support.
How do I make an appointment for relationship therapy and couples counselling?
Once you have made contact with me, I will respond to you within 24 hours, and I will ensure that you both can access an initial appointment with me within two weeks of contacting me.
What If I have any more questions or queries about relationship therapy and couples counselling?
If you would like any further information, or you are unsure about how I could support you, please feel free to give me a call. If you would prefer to e-mail me with any questions or queries that you may have, please do not hesitate, and I will get back to you within 24 hours.
